Ponyfic Roundup 386

Read it Later story count: 92 (nc)

Been a bit quiet around here, hasn't it? Don't worry, there's no sinister reason for that. I've just been very busy. I hope to get "The One Where Pinkie Pie Knows" rewatched later in the week, and to manage a shorter gap between that and "Hearthbreakers" than the one we're experiencing now. Still, at least Ponyfic Roundup is here on schedule, so let's get to the four fics I've been reading this week.

Minor Details! by Tchernobog
Moondancer Reads Every Book In Equestria by Madame Ponka
That First Night by KayeStar
Hidden by FabulousDivaRarity

★: 0 | ★★: 3 | ★★★: 0 | ★★★★: 1 | ★★★★★: 0
Note: I use a skewed rating system. A fic I find average scores two stars.

Minor Details! by Tchernobog
Twilight, Applejack, Celestia, Luna and OC
Romance/Comedy; 23k words; Apr–Dec 2014; Teen

Applejack and Twilight investigate an old artifact. And then they try again. And try, try, try, try, try again.

AJ and Twi begin this enjoyable story as a newly engaged couple. Unfortunately, a mishap with one of Star Swirl's old magical artefacts gets them stuck in a time loop – which may not help either Equestria or their own wedding preparations. It is a little known fact that he, Star Swirl the Bearded, was a bit of a renaissance stallion, which makes researching things a bit of a long job. Mention of "time loop" stories inevitably makes many think of Eakin's Hard Reset (PR 8), but this is a different kind of fic, and in any case Stargate SG-1 is (apparently...) a bigger influence. At any rate, this is nowhere near as dark as Eakin's tale, and for the most part the tone is light. The highlight for me is certainly the interaction between Twilight and Applejack. Their dialogue is a real joy to read, and they come across very believably as fiancées. (Though one of my few quibbles with the fic is that the term "her fiancée" is used enough to eventually become slightly intrusive.) Celestia (especially) and Luna play good supporting roles, and there's a fun OC who unfortunately fades out of the story later on. I did find my interest wandering just a little towards the end, and I wonder whether this might have been edited just a tad more tightly. Nevertheless, a satisfying slice of TwiJack, one which sneaks into the fours thanks largely to the zingy dialogue. ★★★★

Moondancer Reads Every Book In Equestria by Madame Ponka
Moondancer and Twilight
Comedy/Random; 2k words; May 2017; Everyone

Sweater Horse Reads Too Many Books

Moondancer has read all 24,709 books in Equestria. (Is that all? —Ed.) She is now panicking about what to do. Naturally, she asks for help from that noted authority on books, Twilight Sparkle. This leads to some amusing moments with Twilight advising Moondancer to get out a bit more and not stay shut in with books all day – although the comedy of this obvious setup isn't really mined that extensively. There's an amusing ending to the fic, though I'm not sure how well it works nowadays. Maybe a couple too many fandom references in the last third as well – they're not that clunky, but they don't really add much. Overall, one for those who want an undemanding few minutes with a rather underused-in-fic character. ★★

That First Night by KayeStar
Celestia and Luna
Sad; 1k words; Jul 2018; Everyone

Luna isn't the only one who struggled with her first night back in Equestria.

This story is exactly one thousand words long. In it, Celestia muses about how well she's dealing with the return of her sister from her thousand-year exile. This is quite an interesting setup, especially since the story departs (to some extent, at least) from the "I'm sorry Luna, it was all my fault" line that so many other fics go for. It could probably have done with being expanded a bit, but that would have changed its feel. And indeed, feels are what this is all about. A top-end two for me, but perhaps it would shade a three if you're really into this kind of Celestial introspection. ★★

Hidden by FabulousDivaRarity
Pinkie Pie
Sad/Slice of Life; 2k words; Sep 2019; Everyone

Just keep smiling, because you have to.

Here we have a fic about the deep sadness that Pinkie Pie hides behind her smile. Although we've seen this kind of thing many times, there are some touching moments here that do bring the feels – for example, when "you rock back and forth to try and calm yourself down but also because you kind of like the noise one of the springs in the mattress makes." That stung, and I doubt I'll be the only one. There are several moments in this story which seem either to come from personal knowledge or are at least very well observed. Although not so tagged this is a second-person fic, and the nearest thing to a 2p monologue I've seen for a while. It's quite dense and does rather lay things on with a trowel at times. The main downer, though, is that Pinkie's narrative voice doesn't sound at all like Pinkie. Not even like Pinkamena. I get that this is her behind the smile, but except for the mentions of parties and so on, this could be almost anypony talking. It might actually make a better original story than ponyfic, or at least one with an OC rather than Pinkie herself at the core. Quite a decent two, but I didn't really connect with that voice. ★★

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Next time, I hope that stories reviewed will include Flylifa's S6-set adventure How to Friendship a Comet. This was the fic I had to omit from my look at FanOfMostEverything's "didn't get to nominate this for the RCL" post a few weeks back. Now it gets its chance!