Read it Later story count: 94 (nc)
If you didn't see me mention it earlier, we have a new regular ponyfic reviewer on the block! Ghost Mike's Monday Musings kicked off this week, and you can read issue 1 on his Fimfiction account and my thoughts about this newcomer in my last post. Right, I'm going on with my own reviews now. Things may come and things may go, etc, but Ponyfic Roundup carries on through the ages. Today's four consist of one mid-length story and three quickies. Let's get going...
Unchanging Love by Azure Notion
The living end by Cackling Moron
Absense of Chaos by The Ancestor
Late-Night Conversations by EileenSaysHi
★: 0 | ★★: 2 | ★★★: 1 | ★★★★: 1 | ★★★★★: 0
Note: I use a skewed rating system. A fic I find average scores two stars.
OCs and Changelings
Romance/Drama; 23k words; Aug 2019; Teen
With the advent of the Canterlot wedding, change is coming. Sweet Leaf is an undercover changeling love collector, wife, and co-owner to the Sweet Roast Cafe, she can only hope that change is kind.
Sweet Leaf's marriage to Fine Roast seems idyllic for both of them as they run their coffee shop in the quiet town of Hoofington. But there's a big deal coming up: this story begins a short time before Cadance's wedding, and Sweet knows that the plan is for changelings to enslave ponies to feed on their love. There's good tension in Sweet's attempts to keep Fine in the dark not only about her situation, but also that of her hivemates who are also impersonating ponies. The romance of her genuine feelings for her equine husband is nicely judged, too: not over-the-top and quite realistic in tone. We also get some nice world-building about the practicalities of undercover changeling...ing, as well as on how emotionivores survive. A big twist just over halfway through, which isn't really shocking if you're paying attention but does change the dynamics of the story. Not many downsides: it's slightly rough technically in places ("her namesake pie cutie mark"), some may find the ending a little bit too neat, and springing a full-scale royal wedding on everyone at a few days' notice is... demanding, to say the least. But then that one's canon, so I can't complain really. There's an incomplete sequel, but that hasn't been updated for half a year so don't hold your breath. If you like the more realistic, grounded kind of romantic drama, give Unchanging Love a whirl. ★★★★
The living end by Cackling Moron
Twilight, Celestia, Luna and Cadance [and the untagged human protagonist!]
Slice of Life/Human; 2k words; Feb 2022; Teen
Local human stumbles into a competition he didn't know was happening
Walter has a portal under his stairs that leads to the royal palace. He stumbles on the four princesses having tea, and they demand he rate their butts. That's basically the story. It's not devoid of plot [Don't you start —Ed.] but it's not far off. This is basically the Judgement of Paris, but with equine rumps. If you find butts, especially princess pony butts, immensely appealing or amusing or both, you'll likely enjoy this one. I don't have much opinion on them either way, so for me this is just a story really. The author says this is "A very stupid idea based on a pic you may or may not have seen" – I haven't, but the first part is a fair enough assessment. Really if you don't snigger helplessly at the very mention of the word "butts" this is going to bring mild smiles at most. It's not tagged [Comedy] or even [Random], but personally I'd have given it both. ★★
Absense of Chaos by The Ancestor
Twilight and Discord
Sad/Alternate Universe; 1k words; Feb 2022; Everyone
On one quiet evening Empress Twilight Sparkle calls upon her last friend, the avatar of Chaos himself. He provides insight best left forgotten.
In this other Equestria, seemingly in the far future, Twilight rules alone – we barely get more than hints of what's happened, but I think that's quite effective. Some very interesting ideas here, not least that magic is somehow draining from the world and that this is affecting even Discord, who here is a much sadder figure than we're used to in canon, and older in a way that goes beyond the physical. There's a lot of potential for a fascinating story here, but the writer's execution doesn't quite live up to their imagination and so the story doesn't truly fulfil that potential. I think this probably needed either a wider canvas with space for the story to mull things over – or, conversely, a tighter focus on the Discord aspect – in the event, he doesn't appear for rather too long. The story also badly needs proofreading, as there are too many small typos, not least in the fic's title. ★★
Late-Night Conversations by EileenSaysHi
Sunset Shimmer, Rarity and Sci-Twi
Equestria Girls/Drama/Sad/Slice of Life; 6k words; Nov 2021–Feb 2022; Everyone
One year after the destruction of the Memory Stone, Rarity sits Sunset down for an earnest discussion after she realizes her friend is dealing with some intense nightmares.
You really need to know who Wallflower Blush is and what the Memory Stone was to understand this fic properly, so having seen Forgotten Friendship is near-compulsory. One or two of the EqG shorts also get referenced, but only in passing. Anyway, Sunset Shimmer has been bottling up her feelings, because she's desperate to avoid making her friends upset after what she went through in FF. She and Rarity have a midnight talk and quite a lot comes out of that, for both girls. This fic is strong on dialogue and emotion, and this is a believable conversation for both of them to have in these circumstances. Sci-Twi is a fairly minimal presence in the fic, except in the maybe-slightly-too-long epilogue chapter. I was occasionally flummoxed by some of the "American high school life" stuff (I know vaguely what a yearbook is, but what's a yearbook class?) but it was only a minor problem. The epilogue has a short passage of coloured text, which is very mildly irritating. There are a few iffy word choices (describing Sunset as "the red/yellowhead" is seriously clunky) but for the most part this is nicely written. Even for me as a rather casual Equestria Girls fan, I thought it was time well invested. A high three. ★★★
Next time, I hope that stories reviewed will include Harmony Charmer's human and colt Sombra fic My Sweet Baby.
what's a yearbook class?
ReplyDeleteAs an American, I ask the same question. <.< Maybe they meant club or committee or something.
I did. Yearbook was a big part of "Forgotten Friendship" so I didn't think I needed to clarify in-story that it was yearbook committee (as it's referred to in the special), but I guess I should have. FWIW, I didn't call it yearbook class, just "yearbook", but I went ahead and edited it to "yearbook committee" to avoid confusion.
DeleteHaven't read the other three, so this comment is all about Unchanging Love.
ReplyDeleteI'm not blind to its issues; even without the hindsight of its far meatier sequel, it's rushed a bit and truncated. The technical quality of the prose has the odd rough patch (though it's worth noting the fic was substantially cleaned up for its EqD featuring, so one has to wonder what it looked like before), and it doesn't fully reconcile the canon-mandated justification for the Canterlot invasion (but it comes much closer then almost any other fic has). Being objective, your ★★★★ is about right.
Yet I adore it anyway. The characters are just so, so lifelike, to the extent I felt, even on a reread, emotionally affected with every tense, probing moment. The changeling lore is a mix of the familiar and the new, and the tension and realism of the drama is unmatched (one commenter noted Azure Notion had been a site user for eight years, since July 2011, before writing this as their first published fic, and it showed in a well-done description and professional, competent writing).
And, I cannot overstate this, the story benefits so, so much from being basically an all-OC piece (almost all of my favourite changeling fics are basically OC fics, and they usually weaken when bringing canon characters into the mix – oh, Without a Hive, you just stumbled slightly at the end). It allows it to fully craft characters and a story to take advantage of the logistics of changeling infiltrator life without being beholden to pre-existing events of characters (the wedding invasion excepted, but that it's kept offscreen here makes it far less annoying then the innumerable fics starting with a changeling OC in its wake).
Risk of overhyping this one be darned, I can't praise it enough. It also proves – and I'm sure many will be angry about this – that changeling fics set after the reformation simply can't compete with the story possibilities their earlier selves offer. Sorry, skittle bugs, there's no contest.
There's an incomplete sequel, but that hasn't been updated for half a year
It's definitely continuing, even if the pace of uploads (and the length of the fic, only the first act is done and its over 100K already) means, as I said before, it'll probably be 2024/25 by the time it's done.
This fics still ends on a reasonably satisfying note, so don't let the in-progress followup deter you from trying it out (I would even encourage reading said sequel now, but I understand many readers would rather now half to wait constantly on cliffhangers).
It's definitely continuing
DeleteHeh. Just put it down to a decade of just slightly too many authors insisting that absolutely nothing will stop them finishing their fic, and then... not finishing their fic. I don't have my "Completed only" rule for no reason... ;)
I liked that first one a fair amount, too, though it's been so long since I read it that I don't remember the particulars of what its pluses and minuses are.
ReplyDeleteAs to yearbook class, yearbooks are often compiled by a student staff, sometimes as an extracurricular club, but sometimes as a class.
Thanks. Like a lot of US school things, yearbooks aren't really a feature of British schools, but they have spread in during the internet era. Back when I was at school (1980s-90s) proms were almost unknown in the UK too, though they're now common. Yearbooks less so, though I think some British schools now do have them.
DeleteThanks so much for featuring my story! And since I'm nothing if not a shameless self-promoter, "Late-Night Conversations" has a sequel publishing RIGHT NOW! (Will be finished on Friday.) https://www.fimfiction.net/story/512249/shaking-off-bad-memories
ReplyDeleteQuick clarification: LNC was published in Nov. 2021 (Feb 2022 for the epilogue), not Feb 2020, and is 5.6k words.
Apologies for the errors there. The word count one was because I initially read the story before you added the epilogue. The date one was just sloppiness on my part. My practice when a fic is not all released at once is to use a date range, so yours is now correctly listed as "Nov 2021–Feb 2022".
DeleteThank you for the heads-up on the sequel! I normally don't add incomplete stories to my RiL list, but as it's so close to completion I'll put yours on now. I will get to it eventually, but it's likely to be quite some while so please don't hold your breath!
And since I'm nothing if not a shameless self-promoter
Or "writer" as they're sometimes known. ;)
Finally, you're very welcome! I enjoyed the fic and will keep an eye out in case something you write appeals to me in the future. :)