Read it Later story count: 88 (+2)
You'll doubtless already have noticed that this is not the trailed Spotlight of Cerulean Voice's Essenza di Amore. That's because due to various annoying bits of Real Life™ getting in the way over the last few days, combined with my need to post the UK PonyCon write-ups, I haven't got the fic's review finished quite yet. It'll be along next Wednesday instead, all things being well. Fortunately I do have a backup plan, since during UK PonyCon weekend I had enough time on buses and trains to read a few very short fics I chose randomly from Fimfiction. Four, in fact! And those are what I've got for you today.
But a Day by Comrade Bagel Muffin
The Tough Tavern by Polaris Silvermoon
The EEA are taught a harsh lesson by Lord Zarcon
The Dressmare and the Breezies by Snowy Flakes
★: 2 | ★★: 2 | ★★★: 0 | ★★★★: 0 | ★★★★★: 0
Note: I use a skewed rating system. A fic I enjoy an average amount scores two stars.
But a Day by Comrade Bagel Muffin
Pinkie Pie, Cake Twins and OC
G4; Sad/Slice of Life; 2k words; Jun 2017; Everyone
Death can be a scary thing, and when the Reaper comes for Pinkie Pie she just isn't ready to go. Fortunately being the bearer of Laughter has it's perks. Death will let her have one last day any day she wishes, to spend time with anypony she wishes.
An interesting one to start with. It opens with Pinkie's death – from her own perspective. Not so long afterwards, she is met by Death, who brings her to his office. No, this isn't going all Discworld, but instead this Death offers Pinkie the chance to spend one day, from sunrise to midnight, back in the living world. She chooses the Cake Twins' sixteenth birthday. After all, she Pinkie Promised she'd be there. This is cute enough, and there's the odd nice bit of humour (Death: "Standard fees for sinning still apply") but it's let down by the fact that Pinkie doesn't really do anything to earn her reward. It's not even explicitly stated in the fic that her work as a Bearer did it. The fic is also technically pretty rough, being in serious need of a good proofread. So, slightly frustrating in the end. A moderate two-star fic as it stands, but I suspect it could be a three with a clean-up and a better pay-off. ★★
The Tough Tavern by Polaris Silvermoon
Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash
G4; Comedy; 1k words; Mar 2021; Everyone
Only tough ponies allowed, no cute stuff!
Rainbow has a favourite bar where cuteness is right out, so naturally she decides to take Fluttershy along for a visit. Hilarity ensues. Well, occasionally it does, though perhaps unintentionally – Rainbow ordering water without comment is odd for a bar like this. There's a mildly amusing if rather obvious twist which puts Fluttershy's visit in a new light, and a cameo or two for familiar characters. However, this is another fic badly in need of a good proofread, with typos, incorrect capitalisation and tense mixing abounding. Enough to get in the way of the story, unfortunately. The underlying setup isn't bad, but it could be told in a much sharper, funnier way. That and the technical issues mean this can only get a top-end one-star score. ★
The EEA are taught a harsh lesson by Lord Zarcon
Chancellor Neighsay, Ember, Thorax and Other
G4; Comedy/Drama; 2k words; Dec 2018; Teen
The leaders are not happy with the EEA
And they don't mean the European Economic Area, either. :P Ahem. I'd better say right at the start that this fic uses coloured text. A lot. If like me you're not keen on that, it's going to be hard on the eyes. Neighsay is quite an interesting character here, with the events of "School Raze" forming a backdrop to the story and his earlier full-on prejudices having been somewhat diluted. Indeed, he is sometimes the voice of reason against other characters. Meanwhile, the likes of Ember and Thorax are still not happy with how the Young Six were treated. It's a good setup, but it's sadly too ambitious for this little fic to really cope with, especially given the narrative's somewhat rambling nature. You'll also need to be forgiving for "okay, let's fit in a yak joke" stuff on occasion, and again proofreading is badly needed. There's the germ of something interesting here, but right now it's only that... and the coloured text really doesn't help. It looks horrible and hurts my eyes in these big blocks. Fixing that and the technical issues would bump this into the two-star band. ★
The Dressmare and the Breezies by Snowy Flakes
Coco Pommel and Breezies
G4; Mystery/Slice of Life; 1k words; Dec 2017 ; Everyone
Coco is about to loss all her business because she cant afford to make dresses to sell, then somepony else starts making them...
The one and only fic on all of Fimfiction with this character combination! After Suri had mudslung Coco, the latter was having a tough time with her dressmaking job. But then, she starts finding her creations magically and beautifully finished overnight. Who could it be? Well, the character tag tells you that! But this is almost a fairy tale in its construction, complete with a rather pleasant little rhyme. The odd strange word ("minoquin"?) and the ending is a little dull, which is a shame. There's also an apparent passing reference to an old dress-related meme, which is a bit distracting if you remember it. Nevertheless, this is competently written and the Breezies come across fairly well. A very solid two which isn't that far from being a three. ★★
Next week, I should actually have the Spotlight of Essenza di Amore for you all. If I don't, you have my permission to boo and throw virtual tomatoes at me. Though I'm not sure if that's really a punishment, as I love tomatoes.
Sometimes, you just strike out. :B
ReplyDeleteGuess that's what you get for liking tomatoes. :V
You know, given it had been two weeks since the last Ponyfic Roundup, and the preview is nestled all the way at the bottom, chances are no one would have remembered the tease for a spotlight, much less called you out on it. Obviously you had to make a note of it here, goes without saying. But still.
ReplyDeleteAnd ouch… this is a rough week. Lord knows when the last time you had this poor a roster was. Sometimes, quick fics squeezed in while travelling don't work out, do they?
On the other hand, this means there's almost nowhere to go, but up! And not just for Essence di Amore next week, but the regular Ponyfic in the weeks thereafter. So, you know, what goes around, comes around.
Though Present Perfect is right. By liking tomatoes, thy hast brought this upon thyself.
"...I chose randomly..."
ReplyDeleteWell, there's your problem right there! I mean, have you met the feature box? XD
It's not bad but since Celestia is the boss of the eea maybe she should hear about this and have a serious talk with the group and twilight should be there in order to encourage peace.
ReplyDelete