Read it Later story count: 182 (-1)
Back down to two fics this time, though it's not for want of trying: one story had to be dropped because its author nuked their account. They'd only recently published the fic in question, too. This seems to be happening a little more these days than it used to, though I won't speculate on the reasons. Anyway, the two I can cover are:
What is Left by OnionPie
Stormriders by Penalt
★: 0 | ★★: 1 | ★★★: 0 | ★★★★: 1 | ★★★★★: 0
Note: I use a skewed rating system. A fic I find average scores two stars.
Sweetie Belle and Rarity
Dark/Sad/Thriller/Tragedy; 24k words; Aug 2015; Teen
Five years of cheap thrills in the big city has left Sweetie Belle in bad debt with dangerous ponies. Forced to pay up, she returns to Ponyville to seek money from an estranged sister she loathes with a passion.
A tough read, this one, albeit generally for the right reasons. Sweetie Belle narrates, but she's not quite the pony she was. She's both tougher and more damaged, not least by her drug addiction, but her troubles have now caught up with her: she pays up by midnight or she dies. What follows is worthy of that [Thriller] tag as time gets tighter and things get more desperate: the first we see of Rarity, she's herself in terrible danger. The emotions of the story are a real roller-coaster, but in a good way: OnionPie is really good at putting you in the mood of a scene. Both Sweetie and Rarity are believable, though upsetting if you're used to their FiM natures, and the supporting characters work nicely as well – even if the main villain is a little bit one-dimensional and somewhat predictable in his unpredictability. There is one more substantial problem, which is that a significant mid-story reveal only works because Sweetie both doesn't pick up on a very obvious hint (I saw it instantly, which is not a certainty with me!) and doesn't ask Rarity a very obvious question. You can put that down to the damage the last five years have done Sweetie, or indeed the damaged nature of her relationship with her sister, but I at least had to make a little effort to do so and that slightly hurt the immersion. Still, the wonderful atmosphere the author creates pretty much throughout is remarkable – though be warned, those genre tags mean what they say. This is an RCL-inducted story, and I can see why, but for me it falls just short of greatness. A lowish four, but still a four and a recommendation for those not looking for nice, happy fluff. ★★★★
Stormriders by Penalt
Rainbow Dash, Spitfire and Luna
Adventure/Drama/Sad/Alternate Universe; 2k words; Jan 2019; Teen
Spitfire dies in a training accident, which unfortunately we read about in considerable detail straight off. I say "unfortunately" not because it's gory (it isn't) but because it makes for a very wordy opening. Things improve after that, with Rainbow offered the job of Captain and receiving a mysterious gift. The writer also does noticeably better with dialogue than with that opening descriptive section. I didn't guess where this was going, and what actually happened was quite eye-catching, if inevitably rather sketchily described in a fic of this length. This does feel a bit like a setup for a series, though as far as I know there isn't one. As a standalone it's basically one idea (albeit an interesting one) with a bit too much unnecessary verbiage surrounding it. ★★With Spitfire dead and the Wonderbolts in mourning, Rainbow Dash recieves an offer she can't refuse.
Next time on Ponyfic Roundup: stories reviewed should include Pearple Prose's A Grand Day Out.
A new story and a nuked account? O.o Huh.
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't new new. From memory it was published in the summer. I didn't know the username at all, though.
DeleteAgreed on "What is Left," but for slightly different reasons. I was put off by Rarity being in a malaise because reasons, and I was never drawn into her situation enough to understand the decisions she made, leaving them to seem like narrative convenience. But the writing and character work are good.
ReplyDelete