Ponyfic Roundup 544

Read it Later story count: 87 (nc)

Words read this week: 42,149

A mini-heatwave is happening here over the next few days, with temperatures nudging the low 30s – notable for England. As it's almost exactly midsummer, there's not much darkness overnight, but what there is, is also pretty warm and humid. It's not the easiest weather to do things in, though I can at least manage reading! A good job too, as this week's word count is the highest for some time, barring Spotlight editions.

The Long Payoff by totallynotabrony
I Want to Dance with Somepony by ThunderChaserCreate
Zephyr Breeze Doesn't Know How To Flirt by alafoel
Pinkie Pie Swear by Annuska
Rainbow Shadow by RainbowShadow [sic]

★: 0 | ★★: 3 | ★★★: 2 | ★★★★: 0 | ★★★★★: 0
Note: I use a skewed rating system. A fic I enjoy an average amount scores two stars.

The Long Payoff by totallynotabrony
Twilight, Celestia, Luna, Mr Cake and Filthy Rich
G4; Comedy/Slice of Life; 3k words; Sep 2019; Everyone

Invest wisely, because you never know where your money will end up.

The story opens just before Nightmare Moon is banished in the Moon, with her idly defacing a bit coin with a portrait of Celestia. We then follow the progress of this coin through the years, decades and centuries. It's apparently inspired by Livingston Taylor's Dollar Bill Song, but until now I'd never heard of artist or song, so any resonances are lost on me. The saga of the bit, though, is amusing enough and has some nice Equestrian touches – not least a running joke about the awkwardness of a land's currency remaining unchanged for a millennium. I'm glad it isn't any longer, as I found myself starting to tire of the conceit by the end, and many (most?) readers will guess the ending at least in general terms. It's not quite there for me, hence the top-end two. A little shorter and snappier and it might have made a three. ★★

I Want to Dance with Somepony by ThunderChaserCreate
Twilight and Celestia
G4; Romance/Slice of Life; 4k words; Jul 2014; Everyone

Twilight tries to find out why Celestia seemed so sad at the Grand Galloping Gala.

Okay, straight out with it: yes, this is TwiLestia. As City Of Doors (ah, memories) said, it's really one for those who love this particular pairing. Twilight is pretty good here in terms of her behaviour and voicing, but the story wanders about too much. The title is rather shoe-horned into the dialogue late on, and there's even a "Rule" (capital R) that seems set up to have a major impact and then... doesn't. You can ignore the rather tedious argument about grammar in the Fimfiction comments. Not a bad story as TwiLestia fics go, but I can't go above a high two. ★★

Zephyr Breeze Doesn't Know How To Flirt by alafoel
Zephyr Breeze and Shining Armor
G4; Comedy; 2k words; Sep 2024; Everyone

Zephyr Breeze tries to flirt, but he doesn't know how to.

Written for the 2024 M/M Shipping Contest, this is a gloriously silly comedy in which Zephyr Breeze fails spectacularly to get off with Shining Armor. This being an E-rated fic, things never actually get further than the local coffee shop, so this is largely a battle of dialogues. You can probably guess who comes off worse, even if Shiny is not that great at the social whirl himself. That's what makes it fun, really: Shining Armor is poor at dealing with flirting, but Zephyr Breeze is even worse at doing it. I have mixed feelings about the sometimes pretty long paragraphs, but I laughed. ★★★

Pinkie Pie Swear by Annuska
Pinkie Pie and Sonata Dusk
G4 EqG; Romance; 29k words; Jan–Feb 2015; Teen

Five months before the Battle of the Bands, Pinkie Pie and Sonata Dusk have a chance meeting that blossoms into something larger than both of them.

Another romantic story here, but this one is longer, more serious and less absurd than the last. It's also an Equestria Girls tale. It doesn't have the [AU] tag (despite an end-chapter A/N implying that it does) but it does take a few liberties with the timeline leading up to and through Rainbow Rocks, mostly to allow a little more time for things to happen. That didn't bother me. At heart this is a shipfic, and so some of it is pretty predictable, but it's sweet all the same. Both Pinkie and, perhaps more impressively, Sonata come across very appealingly, and while the other Rainbooms and Dazzlings play relatively minor roles they're used well. There's the odd twinkle of humour ("Trash Sentry" had me laughing) but also some tear-jerking moments that come across as organic, not cheap attention-grabs. Even so, the ending leaves a suitably warm note. This isn't quite my genre, so a top-end three for me, but if you really like the sound of the setup it could creep into the fours for you. ★★★

Rainbow Shadow by RainbowShadow [sic]
Rainbow Dash and Twilight
G4; Sad; 4k words; May 2012; Teen

As the sun sets on Rainbow Dash, her colors being to fade away

Friendship is Magic provides several examples of ponies losing their usual bright colouration – when Discorded, for example, or Pinkie Pie fading through "Yakity-Sax". In Rainbow Shadow, which is not a self-insert despite the title's similarity to the author's username, Rainbow Dash's mane is turning grey. Not all at once, either: when she wakes Rarity in a panic near the start, the red has gone, but the others remain, although those too are fading. Rarity suggests dyeing it, Twilight unsuccessfully tries a spell, and so on. There's some real heartwarming stuff here, a piece of it involving Scootaloo which never hurts! It's just a bit too disconnected and uneven to flow ideally. Probably simple inexperience, but RainbowShadow only published two stories so who knows? ★★ 

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Another five fics to come next week, surprisingly enough! They'll be:

A Chat Between a King and a Prince by PoisonClaw
Oh, For The Love Of... by StoryEdge
The Price of a Smile by Trick Question
According to Plan by Vic Fontaine
Her Best Behavior by Fervidor