Ponyfic Roundup 539

Read it Later story count: 92 (+2)

Words read this week: 31,117

Two days late this week, but I think I can be excused that given my need to accompany a relative to a hospital as mentioned in my brief post on Tuesday! Things have calmed down a great deal since, and I'm pleased to be able to bring you the usual selection of five stories. I haven't really got anything else to say, so I'll move on to the story list now:

The Scars of the Past by Lil Penpusher
Hobby Horse by a kobold
The Tower of the Fallen Star by Raleigh
All Our Villains are Horny by billymorph
Night of the Living Plushies by Moonlight Bloom

★: 0 | ★★: 2 | ★★★: 2 | ★★★★: 1 | ★★★★★: 0
Note: I use a skewed rating system. A fic I enjoy an average amount scores two stars.

The Scars of the Past by Lil Penpusher
Tempest Shadow
G4 movie; Dark/Drama; 1k words; Oct 2017; Teen

Tempest's time had come, at last. The Fleet was nearing Canterlot, and she was the one to lead the assault. Finally, after years of training and waiting, her dream of shattering the childish delusion of friendship would become a reality.

An alternative backstory for Tempest to the one we got in the prequel comic. It lives up to the author's promise of being darker, for example in not shrinking from the consequences of ponies' enslavement by the Storm King. Tempest is not a fan of his, by the way, and there's the seed of a great conflict there. Sadly the fic is so short that there's really not enough time for that to take shape – hence the average rating. ★★

Hobby Horse by a kobold
Starlight
G4; Slice of Life; 4k words; Jan 2025; Everyone

Starlight Glimmer has turned over a new leaf and embraced her special talent of magic. She is understandably frustrated when her mentor tells her to stop doing so much magic and get a hobby.

Set shortly after Starlight's reformation, this is a pleasantly easy-reading piece. There's a good look at how Glimmy takes some time to accept that her special talent is magic, which is particularly interesting given that she was often seen in S6-era episodes as relying on magic too much. A sprinkling of fun background world-building about tribal differences in approaches to guitar playing, too. This story feels pretty Starlit, so to speak. Well worth a look for Glimmer fans especially, but not only for them. ★★★

The Tower of the Fallen Star by Raleigh
Celestia, Luna and OC
G4; Adventure; 22k words; Mar 2021; Teen (Sex, Gore, Violence, Death)

Before she was a princess, Celestia was a barbarian wandering the world in search of adventure and glory. In the Tower she found that and more.

Oh yes – what we have here is Ponan the Barbarian, plain and simple, and it's great. Celestia hails from the hard land of Cimmareia, and after a prologue set in the present we're right into the action with our alicorn hero... well, actually she's paying a stallion for sex. There is an overarching plot about finding another pony with wings and horns (guess who?) but frankly that's secondary. This is a broad and bawdy romp, full of colour and danger. There's treasure and torture and ale and farewell. There's even an evil Vizier! All the warning tags are warranted, but not to excess: this is a T-rated fic, after all. One irritation: there's a persistent tense mismatch error, best illustrated by an example cut for spoilers: "she wanted to believe that [...] is a good pony." Perhaps not recommended for children, but otherwise this is rollicking good fun. ★★★★

All Our Villains are Horny by billymorph
Twilight, Rainbow and Mane Six
G4; Comedy/Slice of Life; 1k words; May 2015; Teen

After the defeat of Starlight Glimmer, Rainbow Dash comes to a startling conclusion about the villains they fight.

As she says, rather resistant to all attempts to correct her language, they're all "horny". She means horned, in that every villain they've fought or antagonist they've overcome has horns of some sort. There's a bit of convolution to get this to include griffons and dragons, but that's incorporated into the story and works fine. Of course, this isn't entirely accurate even for 2015, and Rainbow (and the rest) weirdly forgetting to consider Lightning Dust even when Dash mentions a lack of power mad pegasus villains is odd. It's been thoroughly overtaken by canon since of course, given Cozy Glow. This is smile-inducing, but I didn't actually laugh much. Top-end two it is, then. ★★

Night of the Living Plushies by Moonlight Bloom
Flurry Heart, Shining Armor, Cadance, Flash Sentry and Royal Guard
G4; Comedy/Slice of Life; 3k words; Oct 2022; Everyone

Guarding a cookie jar from a single filly is one thing, guarding a cookie jar from a filly and her plushies is a whole other nightmare.

When Flurry is prevented from getting her hooves on those cookies, she comes up with a very magical solution: bring plushies to life, and use them to defend her quest against... well, everything. Shining, Flash, the Guards, you name it. A cute bit of Nightmare Night silliness (it was released on 31st October) that in some ways makes Shiny more of the star here than his daughter. I'd be surprised if you didn't get at least the odd chuckle out of this one. (British problem, and doesn't affect the rating, but "flashlights to serve as torches" reads really weirdly to me!) ★★★

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Back to Wednesday next week, barring yet another unexpected hitch. (No, not you, Hitch.) Five fics as usual, with one longer than the other four. Actually, I've picked that one because I know there's a big reveal late in the story and I want to read it before I get spoiled! Total word count will be down somewhat on this week's, as you'd expect with only five days rather than seven before the next PR. Here's the slate:

"Do wings turn you gay, Headmare Twilight?" by semillon
A Letter to Father by Silvermyr
The Roles We (Are Fated to) Play by AltruistArtist
Lumen de Lumine by Noriko Nakayama
The Only Way is Forwards by Once In A Blue Moon